Reputation vs. Reality: When Your Faith Looks Alive but

What does the ancient church in Sardis have to do with divorced Christian men in America today? A lot more than you might think. In Revelation 3, Jesus warned Sardis that they had “a reputation of being alive, but were dead.” They looked good on the outside, but inside they were complacent, careless, and spiritually asleep.

In this raw and direct Season 4 opener, Todd Turner speaks to divorced Christian men about the same danger we face today—living off reputation instead of reality. Being single after divorce feels like freedom: you can do what you want, when you want. But that freedom often turns into hidden hypocrisy, shallow faith, and a lazy drift into cultural Christianity.

Todd unpacks the landmines: dating without accountability, hiding behind politics, numbing with comfort, and confusing American values with the kingdom of God. With personal honesty and biblical depth, he calls men to wake up, repent, and strengthen what remains.

This episode is for the man who knows he’s been coasting—or who suspects he might be. It’s a wake-up call to move past surface-level Christianity, abide in Christ, and embrace authentic discipleship.

📖 Revelation Study Resources Mentioned

Matt Chandler – Revelation Series (The Village Church)
https://www.thevillagechurch.net/resources/series/revelation

Craig Cabaniss – Grace Church Frisco Revelation Series
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLKszt7BORNdp14vbGIQitR2wwzqkISgVA

Dallas Theological Seminary Free Online Revelation Course
https://www.dts.edu/free-online-courses/

📘 For Men Walking Through Divorce

Men’s Workbook: Healing and Growth After Divorce
 https://www.toddturner.com/books/mens-divorce-recovery-workbook-your-first-step-toward-healing-and-empowerment/

Divorce Recovery Class with Todd Turner
https://www.toddturner.com/unyoked-divorce-recovery-online-course/

Transcript

Todd Turner (00:00)
The best thing about being single post divorce is you can do whatever you want when you want. The worst thing about being single is you can do whatever you want when you want. Now today's episode, it may apply to both genders, right? But how it plays out, I think is gender specific. So I have done something that I haven't done yet on the Unyok Podcast. I'm dedicating

Season four, this is the first episode of season four to my brothers, Christian men. Now women, got actually my last episode was sort of wrapped up season three. I got a lot of feedback from women because I think some things that we say apply to both, right? If we have on our Christian lenses, it's not like, you know, 90 % of the Bible's, 98 % of the Bible written to both of us, both genders.

But I believe sometimes how it applies is gender specific. But I think if you're a woman, I'm not saying abandon ship if you want to. If you listen to this and don't feel like it feeds your soul. I get that. That's fine. I am aiming at the men because I am familiar with the landmines that we step on, our tendencies, the opportunities for the American Christian male post-divorce.

Now, listen, I want to say this. I am not an expert. I've never claimed to be an expert of divorce, care, and recovery. I'm not. I'm just a bloody guy who knows where some of the landmines are. How? I stepped on them. That's how I know. So, you know, this is more like, hey, follow the limping guy over there. He seems to have been down this road before. He's been there. He's done that.

⁓ This is not a look down me coaching and telling you what to do. Right. And some of you know me, right? You know that I don't see this from as a pastor or an expert.

I hope you see it as a guy who doesn't have his act together, but might be a little further down the road. And for those that want to call me out because you know me, let me just save you the time. Before you call me a hypocrite, yeah, I am. You are, we all are. We all have levels of hypocrisy in our lives. I save the stone, throw, just heed the warning. If God...

can talk through a donkey thousands of years ago, he can talk through an ass today, right? So I admit that. But today's conversation is aimed at someone who is listening, who has open ears. It seems that when it comes to warnings, there's two types of people, right? There's two types of listeners. There's a person in rebellion, and I expect them to listen and they'll turn this episode off when things get tough.

when the mirror gets too ugly to look in. But the other person may be blind, unaware, and clueless. And these people have a chance to ponder, let this topic marinate, and hopefully, maybe immediately, ultimately repent. That's what I want out of this. Some of you men listening think you have everyone fooled. You may even have yourself fooled.

But I'm here to say God is not fooled. Your Christian life might be marked with blind spots or the effects of growing up in a Christian American culture, a culture that is easy to swim in. That's what we're gonna discuss. So let's get started on this today. All right, I have been studying Revelation and the letters to the seven churches in Revelation.

Now, if you're like me, you may have not studied this since, you know, for years or decades or never. And you just hear little bits and pieces of this apocalyptic literature. And it feels like heavy. Who can know? Some people believe this and some people believe that. And I'm not sure exactly how I got sucked in recently to this topic. It wasn't because I was looking for any sensational ⁓ Bible study that was, you know, going to

challenge me or in a deep dive into prophecy. That wasn't it because I have come at it before from the sensationalized part of it. But a little aside here, if you're ever going to study Revelation, there's three that I highly recommend. One is Matt Chandler, who has a small series on it. He does a really good job with it. The other guy is named Craig Cabaniss and he is the pastor of Grace Church in downtown Frisco, Texas.

And if you're familiar with Dallas Theological Seminary, they have a free class that you can just sign up for online study. But all three of the ones I've been doing have done this really cool thing. And that is they look at it from this idea of it can't mean to us what was written can't mean to us readers today what it wouldn't have meant to the original readers of Revelation, those seven churches.

And so it puts a healthy lens on it backs away from everything's futuristic and, we've got to interpret the colors of the horses and, the locust must be helicopters. didn't know what, no, no, no, none of that. None of that. The purpose of it was to speak to those seven churches and what would have they thought, what would it have meant to them. the Bible, sorry, I'm preaching here before we even get into this. The Bible is written for us, not to us.

as 20, you know, 20, 25 Christians, it's written for us, not to us. The revelation was written to those seven churches. So we have to read it the way they would have read it. Okay. All that to say it, the book is written to the seven churches in each church. God is talking to and even calling out apocracies to those churches. And he is preaching. Most of them, he

compliments and criticizes. ⁓ But there's this one church, Sardis, and God got on them because he told them they were being insincere. All right, now let's talk about this. I'm gonna read a little bit because you gotta know a little bit about Sardis for it to make sense. Sardis was a wealthy but complacent city. They were once one of the richest cities in Asia Minor.

and they were known by the gold from a nearby river, right? And they did early coin minting. But in the first century, the glory days were behind it. The city lived more on reputation than reality. So when Jesus was giving them a warning, he says, you have the reputation of being alive, but you are dead. Now, the city also was built on this big hill. It had a

Its downfall was carelessness. Sardis sat on a steep hill and it was thought to be sort of impenetrable and unconquerable, but it was twice in history. And so the enemies captured it by sneaking up unguarded paths at night. So while the city slept, they were attacked and conquered. So when Jesus was talking to the city, its readers would have been very aware of

If you do not wake up, I will come in like a thief. It would have understood that because they knew what it meant to be complacent and the cost of being complacent. And then, and then lastly, you know, it was a region that had a strong pagan presence. And I believe it was the cult of Artemis is who they worshiped and then had a lot of sexual immorality with it. And so the moral

laxity, it made it easy for the Christians to blend in rather than stand apart. So Jesus says their works are incomplete and he tells them to repent. And he also tells them, it's very interesting, strengthen what remains. So what in the world does Sardis and single divorce men in America have to do in common? Why are we even talking about this today? Well, here's the gist of this.

You and I live in an affluent community. America. Now, some of us listening are in the suburbs, these big, ex-fluent cities, and some of you are in rural America, and we're like, we're not the same. No, no, we're all the same. Most everybody listening is holding a thousand dollar cell phone in their hand, right? They're in a mode of transportation that they either own or are buying. We are in one, the top 1 %

of the world and we're certainly in the top 0.0001 % in the history of mankind. And many of you listening are professing Christians, dare I say, cultural Christians. We're able to say we believe, right? We went to the church camp, we said the thing, we got baptized and we believe, but many of us aren't.

doers. We believe we're not doers. Now, I've got to, because of what's going on in our country, I need to say something because I need you to know what this is not about. So I'm recording this post the Charlie Kirk assassination. And many of us Christians are standing right now on social media, we're standing on our left or our right wing political beliefs, our

filters are through those things. It is so easy to confuse our roles as believers with our roles as citizens. They are not the same. They are not. They can be blended, but they are not the same. We become comfortable in our version of Christianity based on our behavior, based on our worldviews.

But many of us live in this lazy river of our ideology. We float slowly. Our money, our means make it easy to seek and live a comfortable life. We pick, we justify our side, right or left, and we protect and even fight for our worldviews via memes.

via the people we associate with. We have all kinds of methods that that plays out. But our Christianity isn't hard until you jump off the raft of your current and you walk against the current. That's the hard part. And I'm not talking about what you may think right now. Our culture is, the American culture is certainly having a war right now. We are. Without.

Well, bullets are flying as of this week. But without bullets flying, we still are fighting this cultural war. Who knows where it's going, right versus left. But I'm talking about abiding versus not abiding. I'm talking about Christian culture, not right or left counterculture. OK? All right, we got to go into this. If your Christianity isn't

hard. Maybe you're going with the flow. Maybe your church attendance, the way you vote, the means you like and share is your Christianity. Maybe you defend your worldview, your politics, your good fight more than you understand Jesus's view. Love your neighbors. Trust and obey.

Deny yourself. So I'm going to give an example here. This is not, this episode is not what you think it is. Keep hearing me out. If you're a person on the right, Jesus would tell you, love the trans person, right? Show them respect, show them empathy. He loves them. Why don't you? All right. Those are you on the left.

Challenge those who celebrate the loss of a dad or a husband. Challenge those who think a woman gets to choose what she does with her own body without consideration of what God may say. All right, those on the right, instead of vilifying abortion, why are we standing in lines to adopt and to be totally inconvenienced to raise and support these child in need who we're telling people have the child?

but we're not helping you. Help! Like, I'm talking about denying self that goes above and beyond your political worldview. Now, I'm still not where I need to be yet, but I want you to hear me. I laugh at anybody who says Jesus would have been a Republican or Jesus would have been a Democrat. No, Jesus would have ticked both of them off because he would have never bought in.

to the political party. Jesus already told you what it was about. Love God, love your neighbors to self-sacrifice, to self-sacrifice. And so it's so easy to say, well, God would have stood on this principle. No, would have trumped whatever principle it was by loving God and loving your neighbor, right? Just go look in scripture. The Pharisees and the Sadducees in Rome were so different.

God, Jesus had disciples that would have hated each other, right? There were zealots there. There were people who loved the Roman culture, people who hated the Roman culture. There was tax collectors. There was all kinds of people were his disciples. And then the people who were coming to find out who Jesus were, Jesus made them both mad. They all got together and decided that how are we gonna kill him? How are we gonna get rid of this guy? Cause he doesn't fit our side and he has to be on our side.

Because the other side's wrong. And then they have to be on our side. When they both realize he wasn't on either one of their side, let's get him out of here. Sort of what's going on right now. But anyway, this message is not for a particular party. It's to believers, Christian men, divorced Christian men living alone. This is believers for anybody on either side, either side. Once again, yes, we're living in a culture that is in the crosshairs of one another.

But I'm saying we as affluent Christians live in a culture that celebrates winning. It celebrates, let me reach my goals. And then let me reach my financial goals. Let me feel secure. Let me create or maintain a country that I want to live in. Let me reach or maintain a certain status.

Let me make gods of our families to prioritize our American values, to make decisions for comfort. We chase what the non-believers chase. We side with unbelievers who agree with us, with our worldviews, and the world can't see the difference between us. But we say it as, ⁓ we're just not, we're not bad like they are. I would never vote like that or do that.

And we blend in with those who aren't even believers who don't even believe what we believe. That don't can, once again, I've said this three times now, don't confuse this rant as a rant against the current culture war that we're in. This is much deeper. We all live in an invisible current that's always pulling us to the comforts of individualism and materialism.

and consumerism lifestyles that are in direct competition with Christ and his kingdom. We live in a comfortable, lazy river that we can't see, but it leads us to nominal Christianity, to a destination like the city of Sardis of a reputation without reality. A world where we can post memes publicly, then slip away into our

Dark sin, quietly. When we defend our right to build wealth, chase the things of this world, while we dress the part as an American Christian, the devil loves this comfortable Christian. They're shallow and their roots never grow deep. Okay, Christian man, I'm talking to you here. You know who you are on these dating apps, putting Christian on your profile.

but quickly turning the chat into sex, quickly bragging about what you own, what you do, what you get to do. You play golf with your buddies and you talk about the other political party and how they have no value, no truth, no standards while you go home and do that thing in the cover of darkness. Jesus told the Pharisees that they're whitewashed

Do you remember that little phrase? You know what that means? You're dead on the inside, but you whitewash the outside. It looks great from the outside, but inside, dead, dead, dead. Many of us live on our reputation. We live on the outward actions while inside we chase the things of this world. Some of them public, some of them private.

Pay attention, heed this warning. Like the church in Sardis and Revelations, many of us single men do not have the systems in place to hold us accountable because we can do what we want, when we want, how we want, and we don't have that, dare I say, that wife in our system that holds us accountable, that, you know, a godly wife that would hold us accountable and spur us to live a life

of godliness and authentic life. We don't hang around other men who challenge us because we're lone warriors who can do what we want, when we want, and we set up systems that we can do what we want, when we want, with little to no accountability. And if so, it's superficial account. How you doing, brother? I'm doing great. Good. And then you go off and do the thing, right? That's not real accountability. We need people who we can confess our struggles and who listen to us with grace and not judgmental,

condemnation. So we need people who can we can openly admit that the walk is challenging and they can admit it too. Guys, it's so easy. It's so easy in the American Christian culture to live a fake, insincere lifestyle. It's so easy. The flow is easy. How do I know? I've been the chief guy of this habit.

I've done it many, many, many times. You know, as I've said...

I've learned to play the game. We get to play the good old Christian card, the good old boy Christian card. We know the things to say, we know what to do, but deep down inside, we manipulate the world around us to get what we want. We chase it all, we conquer, we explore, we fantasize, we plot. And this is where I'm gonna lose some of you.

Because some of you know no other level of Christianity. This is the Christianity you were born into. This is the Christian culture I'm talking about. It is a world where we just say, ⁓ we want to be here. The rules of behavior. And if I behave this way, then the world will see me a certain way. And then I'll be that way. I'm a Christian because I play the Christian culture role as I.

Think this, vote this way, look this way. if I say this, I get a head nods. And if I don't do this, I don't get a head nods. Okay, I'll do that. I need to attend church a little bit so that people know I'm not a Muslim. Got it. I'll do that. Right. Let me play the Christian game. But deep inside, after the whitewashing is done, we're over here chasing pleasure. We're chasing a world of status.

of money, Lord, yeah, yeah, I'll give you. Let me go get financially secure. And then once I'm secure, then I'll start the giving. Let me just pretend I'm a Christian while I'm out here, self, self, self, self, self, self, self, we justify it. This is why so much Christianity is broken because we have pastors up here with books called Your Best Life Now. It's insanity. There's nothing about the Christian life at all.

It says our best life now. Nothing, nothing, nothing about it is supposed to be our best life. Now. It's not true at all. We are to die to self and follow Christ. That is game. That is the kingdom that Jesus tells us to go into. Not those world. grew up with thinking we're allowed to play this game because everybody else is doing it. It must be okay. It's not okay. I'm here to say it's not okay.

We live in a world where if you do good, you are good. Just don't be like them. Own a Bible, attend church, say you love the rest of the six days, just go live like the world. Chase what they chase. Stand for what they stand for. But even worse, spend seven days with the mask on.

and then retreat to the quiet dark stuff to fill your desires. What's the remedy for this? What do you do about this? For those of you who are still listening, saying, I think that's me. That might be me here. What do I do about that? How do we wake up? As God told the church and revelation, how do we wake up? How do we do what Jesus asked us to do as true followers? Well, he says, die to self.

and seek first the kingdom, not seek comfort, not seek pleasure, not seek the things of this world, die to self and seek the kingdom.

How do we not be dead in our faith? How do we avoid this hypocrisy I'm talking about that I've lived? again, this is not, I'm not trying to be a pastor here and tell you, I got it right, you've got it wrong, go fix yourself. I'm telling you, I have it wrong. I've had it wrong. And I'm trying to encourage you to look in a, sometimes,

ugly mirror and check yourself. Check yourself. How do we break out of a cultural faith and into a self denying faith where our walk with Christ is what we seek versus the ease of the world chasing pleasures, chasing all the good stuff that our heart desires. You know, in my last episode, which ended season three,

I talked about how God had to scream at me because I wasn't hearing the whisper about abiding and returning to his church because I was avoiding it like the plague. was. And you know, if you're like me, you may have been hurt by the church and it was, it's easy to walk away from the thing that giving you additional hurt. Like our divorces were painful. Our life shifts were painful. Our betrayals.

painful. And then when you see the church, the thing you bought was the hospital and they're lacking empathy and sympathy and not really pouring into you, it's easy to walk away. I get it. I had all my excuses too, right? I don't think the church is very sympathetic to our plight as single adults and they don't really understand what it's like on the other side of marriage.

pretty good at telling pre-marriage people what to do and how to behave, pretty poor on the other side. It's just true. So some of us just sort of avoid church or we just sort of finally attend or attend when we can. I also found that small groups, which sometimes church say, hey, you're not gonna get what you want from the worship sermon. So get into small groups. I don't think they have too many people even in there that relate with my...

challenges in my single adult journey. That's true. That was my excuse. I'm asked there's a difference between excuse and reasons. And you know, I would say those were reasons and I turned them into some excuses.

as a Christ follower, you should want the things of God more than you want the things of this world. More than you want that idol that you have set up or idols.

plural is probably more like it. Well, here's what Jesus says about this, right? About his followers. are just sort of cold hard truths here. So when John, he uses the sheep reference. Now, most of us listening, 99.99 % of us all listening have never been a shepherd. And we've probably never been in a field with a bunch of sheep, with the rods and staffs and the whole thing. But the analogy holds. It's not hard to hear.

Not hard to see. The sheep hear Jesus' voice and he calls his own sheep by name and he leads them out. When he's brought out all his own, he goes before them and the sheep follow him. Ready? For they know his voice. John 10, 27, my sheep hear my voice. I know them and they follow me.

So Jesus didn't phrase it exactly as my sheep will know my voice. So that's a fair summary. The way he actually worded it was this, right? This is important. The sheep follow him for they know his voice. My sheep hear my voice and they follow me. This comes after Jesus talks about false teachers and leaders and the way of this world. Like, how do we know

the voice of our shepherd. How do we hear his word and the teaching of his word? us from that? The busyness of the world and chasing the pleasures and comfort of a culture that wants us to focus on anything.

other than the kingdom of God. That's what it's like to live in this lazy river of American Christianity. Does that make sense? Like scripture is very simple on this. Seek ye first, not seek ye at some point. Seek ye after it's convenient. ye when you're done with that other thing. Seek ye.

First, the kingdom of God. Wanting to know God, know his heart, his statues, his law, his words. Time alone with Christ. Abbott Bible reading. True worship. And I'm not just talking about singing on Sunday mornings, right? Time with other Christians. Prayer.

Okay, so I'm going to a little side here. Hey Todd, I pray. Okay, no, no, I'm not talking about praying for things. Us Americans are really good for that, right? Before our meals, Lord, blessing we pray for your blessing. We thank you for this. And immediately it's, and we pray for something, right? And this is why I typically don't pray before meals. I'm not saying that's right or wrong. just praying before meals feels so ritualistic to me of just

⁓ It feels so shallow, Christian-ese chatter. It is good. Don't get me wrong. Many people pray four meals and you're great. God bless you. Keep going. But being authentically, not ritualistically, thankful and grateful is admirable. It's what we're supposed to do.

I've just found that authentic snot on the carpet prayer is so much more authentic than pre-mil prayers. It's praying from your heart and praying your troubles and your thoughts and your begging for mercy, authentic prayers. This is the kind of prayer I'm talking about. I'm not just talking about prayer. I'm talking about prayer.

Do you drink or drink? know, like, yeah, I'm talking about prayer, like real prayer, not just the ritualistic prayer. That's what I'm talking

True discipleship is being a follower of Christ and his teachings, not asking God to follow you, which is what we're doing in these prayers, not a normal prayer. It's like, Lord, I'm headed in this direction. Join me. Lord, bless this thing. Bless this. Lord, we ask for protection of it. Like, I'm going on with my life. Lord, join me. That's what I'm asking you to join is join this battle.

Join this effort, join where I'm headed versus the sheep thing. Follow me. Meaning, Lord, I want to go where you go. And he's telling you it's going to be hard. It's going to be hard. And saying, I will follow where you lead in my life, I will follow. If that means I have to walk away from these things that I want, this

cultural Christianity that I'm in living this inauthentic life of of pretending we're good when we're bad and That's what that's what this whole episodes about is I know there are plenty of you men listening Who know how to be the good old boy? I drive the truck. I got the cross I make fun of anybody who doesn't stand for America and the way I see America needn't go

And Lord, I'm fighting the good fight because I'm fighting this political fight. You got like, I didn't ask you to do that. Do you love me? Are you spending time with me? Are you spending time with brothers and sisters who I'm asking you to spend time with? Are you listening to my word? Are we in a relationship where I don't have to scream? I can whisper and all those people that you're hating because they defend Charlie Kirk. Don't defend Charlie Kirk.

I love all of them. They are made in my image. Do you love them? I love them. I died on a cross for them. Your enemy who you were so sure God hates because they don't think like you. God said, I love them. I love them. And I've asked you to love them. He didn't ask you to create an America you want to live in. That's not what he asked. He didn't ask you to defend a country where your wealth is protected or

whatever whatever law it is you want, whatever utopia is you want, God is concerned with the kingdom, not your kingdom. He's asked you to relinquish your kingdom and chase his. So it's so easy, brothers and sisters, if you're still listening to defend an American Christian culture. And right now we're in a civil war of people debating what that Christian culture is. And we're getting

blinded by the hatred to one another to say, no, it's this version. No, no, it's this version. If you love people, here's how you would act. if you love people, here's how you would act. you should cry where I cry. you should be outraged where I'm outraged. And God's like, no, no, I'm missing it. You're both missing it. Seek ye first the kingdom of God. Love your neighbors. That's what we're supposed to be doing right now.

And to get my call for us, right? I'm not talking to the world here. I'm talking to you brothers who are living this life that I'm is while we're at home and we get to create whatever world we want to create because we're single. Some of us are even empty lessors of my age. I am, and you can make a, the world you want to live in and you can create this world where you look righteous. You look cool.

You look like you love the Lord because you're behaving all the right ways, but you know, you know, deep down inside, you're chasing the things that make you feel good, that make you numb, that bring you comfort. Your bank account, you want it full. Your bed, you want it full. You're being greedy and you're playing a hypocritical game.

And God is not fooled. He's not.

What does God tell the church in Revelation, Sardis? He says, wake up, strengthen what remains and remember the gospel you had received and what? Repent. Now, brothers, this part's embarrassing me to say out loud because at this point I'm only speaking to one person listening. That's okay. It's so easy to numb. It's so easy to treat yourself.

It's so easy to say, deserve this thing. I just deserve it. I did this for years. As divorced brothers, there's hope. Your life may have come crashing down. It probably did. Divorce is not easy. But your life isn't over. The one you thought you had is over. That one's gone. It's brutal. But don't wallow. Don't get bitter.

Don't numb. don't look for empty placebos. God works really well in those who have been crushed, those who repent. We have failed, but you and I are not failures. We sin, but we're not sinners anymore. We are redeemed.

Children of God We've been forgiven. We are loved our world crashed down and some of you listener are still the ashes Some of you are in the fire still and some of you are in rebuilding mode all of these post-divorce phases need Jesus every one of them Not the mask of Christianity. We need Jesus

But our hypocrisy, our double lives, our double tongues, they're dangerous to us, our kids, our friends, to the women we date. All right, let's go there. I, ready, let me, once again, let me stop the stone throw here. I have been a horrible example of salt and light on many occasions. I've dropped my guard.

I've dropped my standards, I've dropped my integrity, and I have lowered the name of my father more times than I want to admit out loud. What was my first step? What was your first step when you realized that? Repent. Repent! In my last episode, I've already mentioned this, I think I titled it, you are not the captain of your own ship, right? I get into this idea more like...

This idea of we can't captain our own ship anymore. We have to at some point pull the sails down, turn the wheel, turn the wheel, repent, come home, apologize to the Lord and acknowledge what you've been doing. While we are in our selfish freedom, pleasure, captaining of our own ship, Jesus calls us to follow.

Quiet our lives. Repent. Come home.

In our culture, guys, it's so easy to fake fruits. In a culture where Christianity is easy because American Christianity allows us to seek our own paths. We control our own security, our own goals. We're American Christians. Artificial fruit duct tape to a broken, corrupt tree. Dead trees don't produce real fruit.

Real fruit come from alive trees. It's easy to produce fake empty fruit, but love

Love is easy to fake. The cultural Christian is so easy to fake. Being nice to someone because they believe like you. Being nice to someone because of how they share your goals. Being nice to someone because of how they share your hobbies. Being nice to someone because they have already reached your idol. They already have it. Money.

popularity, position, stature, looks. Being nice to someone, ready? Because of how they make you feel. They help you in your desire to find comfort and to accomplish a goal or revenge or to numb or to feel pleasure. Jesus and his ways are counter to all that. It's hard to love your enemies. It's hard to say no to self.

And then there's other broken women out there that we date. They're vulnerable and they're living in the same blind Christian life that you may be living in. It's easy to take advantage of those situations of people who are looking to numb and they want to feel valued. Don't do it. Say no. Just because something's available doesn't mean you need to do it. Protect you and protect them.

Not every time and not every activity that looks like joy is real. Peace can be faked. I'm here to shout today, Jesus isn't fooled. He calls us to a life that tells us to kill these things and follow him. Do not store up treasures on earth, but rely on daily bread. Love your neighbors, your enemies, not the people who look like you, not people who act like us.

that want the same things as us. I'm hoping this episode, Light heals and reveals.

You won't get away with it. And if you are numbing and many of you are trying to rebel in this numbing and the devil has you in this lazy river, it feels good. You feel like you deserve it. Your life didn't go away. You planned. You have the resources, the looks, the personality, the money to create the comfortable and happy life you're wanting. Saying you're a Christian in America makes you a Christian somehow. We know how to play that game.

But Jesus knows, he knows it's inauthentic. He knows the truth. A real authentic Christian relies on the spirit. How do you get that? You must abide. Wealth, and listen, once again, if you can hear me right now, you're rich, makes it easy to rely on yourself, our means and our motivation. Our culture lets us get away with it. Medicine, money, credentials.

But, divorced men, the best part is the worst part. Remember where we started.

We can do whatever we want, whenever we want. And our bookstores and social media are full of self-confidence, self-esteem, self-reliance, calls, book titles, social media. just scroll, it's all there. We need Jesus. That is the only reliance of Christians that we have. Jesus...

doesn't say wealth in itself is simple, but he constantly warns us that riches are dangerous to the soul.

They can blind, they harden, and they can create false security. Entry into God's kingdom requires humility, dependence, surrender, qualities that wealth often fights again. The kingdom flips values. The poor, the humble, the generous are exalted. Why these self-reliant rich often miss it.

day in a world where everything around us screams pleasure.

This week, a famous pastor screamed, if your church doesn't condemn the assassination of Charlie Kirk, find a new church. I find that laughable. It really is laughable. There's always evil in this world. The devil is always busy. And as much as the death saddened me, and I think it's horrible, and I do believe there is a time for wise men to speak out against what's going on. I'm not against that, right?

I'm just saying we're not even done with this civil war, this cultural war. We're not, it's not as far from over. And unfortunately that's probably the, not the last bullet that's kind of fly, unfortunately. But if you, I'm here to say, if your church doesn't preach the gospel, if it talks about politics more than it reads and impacts the word of God, if it doesn't teach love your neighbor, the ones that don't line up with your views.

your political views. Leave that church. That's the church you want out of, not the one that doesn't stop teaching the gospel to go speak on some the latest little thing that has you in a fit. Like this feels so unhealthy to take that attitude. I saw somebody literally make a video walking out of their church. Well, I did what they said. You know, they didn't say what I liked in that church. So I'm leaving. It's like, I think Jesus like, yeah, you should have left.

What? That's insanity. Don't get caught up in that nonsense that's going around the internet right now. Don't do it.

A healthy church is the answer. And surround yourself with others who live in the spirit, who stay in his word. Once again, we don't need more fake fruit. We need healthy trees. We need to abide. Then we will have real fruit, real reputation, real friends, real influence, real joy. His warning in Revelation in chapter three is repent.

Your family may have failed you. Your marriage, whether it's your fault or not, may have failed. But guys, you are still loved. And you can get your act together. God will walk with you. He won't crush you beyond what you can handle. He's gentle. Sometimes discipline hurts. Oh, it does. I'm in the middle of it. Right? But you can handle it. He needs you to let go.

Let go of the mask you carry. Let go of the soap box you love to jump on. Let go of that fake reputation. Be humble. Walk in humility. Repent and ask. Notice I'm not saying beg. God doesn't need you to beg. He's a loving father. He just needs you to ask. He needs you to repent. He'll do his part. You do yours. Some of you think right now you have everyone fooled. You may even have

yourself fold, but God is not fooled. Let's say you were the one of the few people who made it this far in this message and you're like, you know what, Todd, glad you said this, but this is not for me. Like I really, I love the Lord. He got my act together and I don't see any hypocrisy in my life. Good. What are you doing to encourage someone else? Are you at your church modeling and encouraging those of us who do have problems are

Those of us who don't want to walk into church because we don't feel hurt. If you're listening, you made it this far and you do not feel any blood from any of these arrows, then please help those of us who have the arrows that are bleeding, are limping into church. And we need good counsel. We need brothers to say, I have been there. I know what you're going through and I'm going to help you walk. I want to help you limp. I want to help you around the landmines that you're having to deal with.

I think everybody needs to hear this message. really do. Are you doing anything in your church to help your fellow brothers and sisters? All right, guys, enough preaching. I'm here. This is for you. This literally is for you. It's for me, too. It like we're all in this thing together. And I just want you to take a healthy look at yourself and challenge yourself, because I know it is so easy to be a hypocrite. It is so easy to play Christian.

And in the world of chaos right now, we need men, real men of God to get healthy because the world needs us. There are people who are lost. There are people who need hope. And when we're hypocrites, we are the last thing that your next spouse is going to want to attach themselves to. Men, get your act together so that God can show you the godly woman that you need in your life so that you too can serve him.

not Christian culture, you can serve Him.

without hypocrisy. Blessings.